Hope and Chillzones

Moving to Illinois for my first semester of college was harder than expected. In fact, it was harder than it should have been. Had my college been a school where students chose to stay on campus, rather than returning home every weekend, it would have been fine. However, that wasn't how my situation ended up. My first semester was spent with many lonely nights. I missed my best friend. I missed my boyfriend. I ended up wishing that I'd gone to the local community college, if only to get that sense of membership that I wasn't getting at Benedictine.

That isn't to say that I didn't make any friends, though. I did. Quite a few, in fact. Amy, Michelle, Stephanie, Vy, Nicole, Katherine, and others. There is a supreme problem in most of these relationships, though.

Amy and Vy were my geeky friends. Like me, they both loved Harry Potter. Vy played video games and owned Settlers of Catan. Amy was a publishing major and could swap literary stories. All three of us worked at the library together. All of us were using Benedictine as a stepping stone. Only, they both stepped off too early.

Amy just transferred to Green Valley in another state. She'll visit us from time to time, she promised, but it doesn't make up for the fact that we aren't going to be heading to the movies or Coal Ben anytime soon.

Today, I found out that Vy transferred to College of Dupage. It's only about fifteen minutes from my campus, but it seems like a lifetime away. She was a commuter, so she was barely at Benedictine anyway. Now she's never going to come around.

When it comes down to it, I'm jealous of them. I know I'll be transferring to SUNY Albany or Siena in 2012, but it isn't soon enough. I'm paying out of my butt to go to a University that I'm not enjoying. It just doesn't seem right. By now, I'm only staying there for the hope that I'll be able to get an internship at Sourcebooks next semester. If I don't, it will have all been for naught.

I did mention more friends up there, but here's the thing: We have nothing in common. We threw together this group in the beginning of the semester and clicked a bit. Our personalities don't mesh, though. They're into clothing, into Twilight, into Popular Culture in ways that I'm not. That doesn't make them bad people. These are some of the nicest girls that I've met, ever. That doesn't overcome the fact that they won't understand my Doctor Who comments, or my references to specific magic cards.

I miss having nerd friends. I miss hanging out with people who make jokes about time travel and zombies. I miss having friends who invent games like strip!magic.

I'm hoping next semester will bring a group that comprehends my interests, and shares them. We have a Science Fiction / Fantasy club on campus. The reason I didn't join last semester was because my job conflicted with the times. I'm going to try my hardest to join this year.

Three of my classes are geared specifically towards Writing and Literature majors, so I should be finding people in there that share my passion.

Hope is all I have at this point.

Hope and Chillzones.