Many things have happened in the last few weeks. Most importantly, I lost my Google password and had to get a new one. I didn't abandon you. My password abandoned you.
So, life hasn't been absolutely rainbow and puppy dogs like last semester. Somehow I'm already a third through my second semester and I feel like I have no grades. That being said, I feel like I'm doing worse because I have nothing to base my achievement on.
Beyond that, I've been falling into a depression. I don't want to be here and it's obvious to everyone around me. Well, except for my roommate who keeps insisting that she "shares my pain", despite her living only forty minutes away. But everyone else sees it. My parents, my friends, my professors, my employers, and my poor pair of sweatpants know that I'm utterly despondent.
Mostly it is to be blamed on the month of February. February is a terrible month, you see. It hold Valentine's Day, Dave's birthday, and our anniversary all within two weeks. Along with that, it's the month that I have to pay my car insurance, cell phone, and loan payments. I'm confronted with two huge problems: Money is extremely tight, totally robbing me of my sanity. I'm lonely to the point where I write random lines in my journal.
The latest: My wire DNA is rusting. I feel like that should be analyzed. As someone afraid of death, I like to pretend I'm made up of machinery and gears, so that I don't feel so fragile. So, the worst thing that could potentially happen to me is rusting. Kind of emo. Very emo. Oh, Gosh, do you see what February is doing to my brain?
Please leave, February. I dislike you.
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